But there was something in Brendan that felt safe with this man. He knew he could trust him, and that he would also probably understand.
He leaned forward, resting his chin on his clasped hands.
Brendan: The job was only part of it. I mean, yeah, it was a fantastic opportunity on a larger scale than I’d been workin’ but still, I had been happy in Dublin and I loved my work there.
Brendan: Losing Evan gutted me. Literally took all the life out of me. I thought…I thought that he had been the one, and we would have the happily ever after and I had forgotten that there were other people involved…he chose one of them.
Remy, of course, knew all this, but he’d never really heard Brendan talk about Evan other than to share an innocuous anecdote.
Remy: I’m sorry. I know how much it hurts to have your heart broken.
Brendan studied the calm blue water in front of them. The afternoon sunlight bounced off of it, seeming to shoot sparks of light.
Brendan: It broke Evan’s heart too. I think that if Samantha and I had been into it he’d have chosen both of us. But we weren’t, so…he chose the person that was the most “home” to him, I guess. And that’s cool…Samantha is amazin’ and we became really good friends. But…I guess I thought it would be me.
Oh God, he didn’t want to cry. He’d cried for days in the immediate aftermath, holed up in a room, not speaking to anyone but his mother and sister Maggie. He wouldn’t take Evan’s pleading phone calls, finally texting him with a request to be left alone, that he would get in touch when he felt ready.
Remy could see the tears starting at the edges of Brendan’s blue eyes, threatening to fall, but not quite succeeding. He reached over and touched Brendan’s knee.
Remy: I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I didn’t meant to upset you.
Brendan: No, I’m happy ye did. Anyway, for a few months I was a zombie. I went through the motions of life, but I didn’t really live. My boss Frannie thought maybe I needed a change and called one of her friends at the ASPCA in New York. It was what I needed. I could focus on building a new life and not focus on losing Evan. And after a while…I could talk to him again.
Remy: And now you’re ready to try again?
Brendan studied Remy’s face. He was so beautiful.